Gaming creates an illusion and here’s why

 So, parents of a gamer have probably heard the phrase “I’m hanging out with my friends” shouted from behind a closed bedroom door, accompanied by the sound of a clicking keyboard and muffled laughter through a headset.

And here’s the thing: they’re not wrong. Gaming online can connect people across states, countries, and time zones. Your player might be leading a Fortnite squad with a kid from Texas, a college student from Ohio, and a new friend from Canada. And they are all working together for that glorious Victory Royale.

But while gaming connects people digitally, the struggle is that it can disconnect them emotionally. You see, there’s a strange irony in today’s world: we’ve never been more connected, yet so many feel completely alone.

At first, gaming feels like a social lifeline. Players talk, laugh, and share moments of triumph and failure. But slowly, subtly, that digital space can start replacing real-world relationships. Instead of meeting a friend at youth group or grabbing ice cream after school, the gamer might think, “Why bother? My friends are online.” And now, the struggle is real.

And then, that’s where isolation creeps in. Not the larger than life Thanos style villain with a desire to snap away half of the universe, but more like a friendly roommate who overstays their welcome.

Because while online friends are real, there’s something sacred and irreplaceable about face-to-face connection. God designed us to experience real presence. To hear tone, read body language, share a meal, and even endure the awkward silences that remind us we’re human.

And when you think about it, Jesus modeled this. He didn’t just send messengers and messages from heaven. He came in person. 

God with us.

He ate with people. He walked with them. He touched the sick. He wept with the grieving. He looked people in the eye and called them by name. His ministry wasn’t built on distant communication. It was built on personal connection.

And bro, that’s powerful.

See, genuine relationship require presence, not just proximity. Just like Jesus didn’t save us from afar, we’re called to show up in person for the people we love. Our kids, our families, our friends, and yes, even the gamers behind the screen.

And yeah, it is a struggle. You’ve seen it: a group of teens sitting in the same room, every one of them looking at a screen. They’re technically together, but relationally worlds apart.

Gaming can create a similar illusion. Your gamer can be surrounded by voices online yet still feel lonely once the console powers down. Studies show that prolonged screen time, especially when it replaces real-life interaction, can increase feelings of isolation and even depression.

And for many gamers, that “digital silence” hits hard after the session ends. The laughter stops. The notifications fade. And suddenly, the room feels emptier than before. And they struggle.

But here’s the good news. You don’t have to unplug the console and declare war on gaming. (Please don’t. I can tell you from experience that it does not work.)

Instead, here are some small, powerful ways to help your gamer through the isolation struggle and find real connection:

• Enter their world before you try to fix it. Ask questions. Watch them play. Learn what they love about the game. You might be surprised at the teamwork, creativity, or problem-solving involved.
• Model healthy connection. Have dinner together without screens. Invite their friends over to play in person. Be present. Sometimes, your quiet consistency speaks louder than a dozen lectures.
• Create balance. Encourage both digital connection and real-world presence. Maybe Friday night is game night, but Saturday is family day. Rhythm creates health.
• Remind them they’re seen. Not just by you—but by God. Even when they feel alone, they’re not forgotten.

The Bible reminds us, “Two are better than one… If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9–10, NIV)

This isn’t just a nice proverb.

It’s a divine blueprint. God never intended for us to go through life solo-queued. From the very beginning, He said, “It is not good for man to be alone.” (Genesis 2:18) We were created to belong, to share burdens, to celebrate victories, and to lift each other up when we fall.

And this is why isolation hurts. It goes against how we were made. But when we step into community, even imperfectly, we start reflecting the heart of God Himself, the One who showed up for us and invites us to do the same for others.

So the next time you hear your gamer shouting, “Let’s go, squad!” from the other room, smile. They’re connecting and that’s good.

But also remember that God designed connection to go deeper than a Wi-Fi signal. The best kind of “multiplayer experience” doesn’t require a controller. It happens when we look up, lean in, and love people face-to-face.

Because in the end, it’s not just about winning the game. It’s about not losing the connection that matters most.

Make the connection:

Create a rhythm within your family for a consistent in-person connection point without the presence of screens, using the time to remind them they’re seen and loved.

Connecting gamers • Building communities • Creating champions